HazyDaze

Today marks 100 days to Baby’s due date. *Gasp!

I know this because, the news kept announcing that its 100 days to the 2008 Olympics. It’s so scary! I want to scream.

Anyway, we went around town and bought a few baby stuff including a swing, seat and his first stuff toy.

Its completely baby safe and machine washable. His name is P’nut. He is really very cute. I’ll be sleeping with P’nut every night from now onwards till Baby is born to “cultivate” my smell.

I think I found my pregnancy craving. I warn you, it’s quite weird.

Watermelon and Chocolate combo.

I started with watermelon and chocolate ice cream 2 weeks ago. Then I had kit kat and watermelon combo. Today, I’m back to Watermelon and chocolate with chocolate chip ice cream.

I’m so weird.

KL is back with jet lag.

Last night I slept with 2 babies tossing and turning in bed - one beside me, the other inside me.

I didn’t catch much sleep.

Been watching a whole lot of movies lately to keep myself occupied while KL is away. Today, I watched “Across the Universe”

It’s a musical without the cheesiness. I believe it’s all Beatles music. It’s so nice. The music is familiar and the story line blends so smoothly with the music without trying. There is no sudden burst into music sort. It is really quite subtle. The whole show is about 2+ hours.

I’ve also love music from the 70s. I think the Baby loves music too. Since I woke up, I had my itunes really loud and the Baby’s moving a lot. Throughout the movie, he moved whenever there is music. I think he is dancing.

I’m so convinced he is a music lover. He loves especially when there is guitar playing or drums. I think he might be a emo guitarist. I sure hope not a drummer coz I don’t want to imagine him practising his drums.

Recently ordered this classic book from amazon - Goodnight Moon. Apparently, it is recommended everywhere I’ve researched.

It’s a really old book. The picture of the author look like a character in “I love Lucy” and also is in black and white. The pages are like those jotterbook material.

The story… err.. there is no story. It’s just a book that says goodnight to everything in the room. It’s seriously damn boring.

The illustration in the book is poor but colourful.

But, I love the book! Really love the book. I have been reading the same book to Baby every night since last week. It’s so simple and easy to read. It’s definitely a book to be read at bedtime.

I am glad I am having a smooth pregnancy so far and pray it will continue.

Hospital
Firstly, I booked myself into the Hospital C because it is really close to home. Exactly 2 trams stop away. When the doctor’s assistant booked the hospital for me, I was 5 weeks pregnant. After doing a maternity ward tour, I realised there was a waiting list and I was the 2nd on the list.

I’m 23weeks now and they haven’t called to tell me if I got a place. In February, I panic and called the hospital to see if I was still on the waiting list, the nurses there said that they were not offering places to those due in August yet, however, my chances look very good. Last month, I called again to check and they again said they were only doing those due in late July. This time, they said, my chances looked very slim.

Being pregnant at 20weeks then made me worry about not booking into any hospital or attending any pre-natal classes. I got really stress as I really didn’t want to give birth on the streets. Of course I was angry with the hospital. It doesn’t make any sense for me to go to another hospital when I can practically walk to Hospital C.

Stressed, I had to quickly booked myself into both Hospital W and Hospital J - both small private hospital. I know, its damn Kiasu but based on the circumstances, I realised angmo more Kiasu than me. After viewing both hospital, I still couldn’t make a decision because my first choice is still Hospital C, simply because it is nearer and it’s a Catholic hospital. I have no one to give me feedback on both. At the end, I chose Hospital J, simply because it is the private wing of a major hopsital. In case anything happens to me or the baby, I get immediate care instead of being ambulanced from the small private hospital. Guess what? Hospital C still haven’t call me back. *sigh…

Work
I’m constantly stressed at work. We have been short staffed since last year and I am doing 2 person’s work. My boss is great and understanding but his boss is a pig. I’ve been told that big boss is stressed coz there are “too many pregnant women” in the office. When we finally found someone for the position, I heard him hinting to my boss “are you sure you want to hire another child-bearing age girl? Can’t you find someone older or maybe a man?” OH MY GAWD! I really want to report him! At the end, the scrounge only allowed us to hire this person in June (new financial year) and only a one year contact. I wonder what is the point when I have to deal with the work till June and then there is little handover time when I go away on maternity leave in July. ARGH!

Maternity Leave
Should I take the whole year off? Initially planned to get back to work after the 4th month. We need the money and although I complain about work, I really enjoy what I am doing. Lately, I have been thinking, “Do I want to miss Baby’s developments?” But often ask myself if we can afford for me to be on leave for so long.

Childcare
If I do eventually go back to work, I worry about childcare. How safe is it? It is expensive. Guess what? After advise from the mothers in the office, I realised I might have problems getting my baby into creche because I didn’t put my name down the moment I know I am pregnant. This whole childcare/creche system scares me and to make it worse, there is a long waiting list. Since I worry about childcare and going back to work, it’s not easy. Not like we can leave the baby with the grandparents.

I read that stress is good for the baby. I only hope I am not overwhelming him with stress.

In the last 3 hours, I suddenly have a new complaint. My belly button hurts!

Apparently, the belly button pain is caused by the pressure of the expanding uterus on the belly button. And it usually happens after the 20th week.

Oh my, it hurts so bad.

I have been developing a relationship with my unborn child lately.

In between the bedtime stories and nursery rhymes, I have been talking to him rather recently. Mostly, I would rub my belly and say hello. Other times, I would tell him what I am intending to do next (eg: Let’s walk to Art Centre to meet Daddy). Of course every often when I get some uncomfortable kicks, I would plea with him to play nice.

Lately, I have been taking the public transport to work alone. On the tram in the morning, the baby moves quite a bit. I wonder if it is a different experience and it feels quite unnerving because KL usually drives me to work. I’d rub my belly and hum a tune and he would usually stop. I like to think he feels comforted with my voice and the warmth of my hand on the belly.

Yesterday, I was nervous about getting a flu shot. Although it’s perfectly safe to have one while being pregnant as well as it is highly recommended that I do so, I can’t help to think that I might be harming him. So on my way to the flu vaccination centre, I stopped by the toilet. I took the second last stall and thinking I was alone, I rubbed my belly and said, “Baby, you sure its okay? You ready for this?” Next thing I know, there was a flush in the next stall. SHIT! I realised I’m not alone.

I came home and told KL about it. He thinks its hilarious because the person might think I was talking to my privates and preparing my privates for a pee. Hahaa…

We borrowed “40,000+ Baby Names” book from the library. But, we still couldn’t find the ideal name. It’s really difficult to find a name with a ‘clean-slate’. Hard to find one that we do not know of anyone by that name. No bombastic names, no weird spelling, no boring names. Yes, we are very fussy.

However, coincidentally, KL dreamt of a boy’s name on the 2nd week of my pregnancy. The name has been dwelling in our head for a while, so it grew on us. Finally, we decided on that name but as of to date, we are still debating on the spelling.

We have also decided not to tell anyone the name. Not so much about worrying someone might steal the name but mainly we do not want anyone’s comment on the name before the baby is born. Especially if it’s a negative comment.

Everyone’s always giving their 2 cents worth on pregnancy, baby, nutrition, parenting, etc. It is fine if it’s just their thoughts on it, but sometimes, I feel like they are trying to enforce it on you.

For example, a good friend was telling me all the pros of cloth nappies. Environmentally friendly, easy on the pockets, no baby rash, etc. I agree, more pros than cons. But, here is the catch - who is going to scoop the poop, wash the nappies, dry it and then fold it? Is this good friend going to do it for me? Do I have a maid? NOPE! So, the idea and concept is good, but it is not feasible. Strangely, this good friend is continuing her efforts to convince me and for some reason, makes me feel like a bad parent if I didn’t do what’s best for the baby.

Another example, an ex-colleague who is pregnant (just gave birth) confided in me recently about how she was indirectly accused of being a bad parent because she bought a cheap cot. Apparently, her colleagues told her that she shouldn’t buy such a cheap cot for her baby and should get the best (aka, expensive) one for the baby. I told her who cares as long as she like it and it meets the Safety Standards here. Sometimes, people open their mouth too early without going thru their head first. I then proceed to tell her about our plan of not telling anyone about the baby’s name. She think its brilliant. In fact, she told everyone she is going to name her daughter, Victoria. Guess what. People advised her not to name her daughter after Posh Spice. *sigh… She love the name and wasn’t naming her baby after some celebrity to say the least.

So far, I’ve learnt to filter advise from everywhere/everyone. We are still keeping the name a secret until August at least.

KL have been reading and singing nursery rhymes to the baby in my tummy lately.

Monday: He read, “The Diary of a Wombat”.

Tuesday: He read, “Koala Lou”.

Wednesday: He sang this KoalaLand inspired nursery rhyme:

Row row row your boat;
Gently down the stream.
If you see a crocodile;
Don’t forget to scream….
AAHHHH!!

Thursday: He read, “Pooh’s Heffalump”.

Friday (Today): He should be reading, “Oh, the places you’ll go.” I don’t know the story yet. It’s my first Dr Seuss book.

That’s all the children’s book we have. I think KL got to read the papers tomorrow.

I felt the baby move about the 18th week of the pregnancy although I thought I was just gassy and needed a good fart. Normally, most first time mothers would only feel the baby move after the 20th week. I am one of those sensitive people.

Lately, the movements/kick/punch has gotten slightly stronger. It usually takes me by surprise. Its quite a funny sensation. I was warned that as I progress, it would not be funny anymore. In fact, it will hurt so bad that I might even swear.

The other night, while watching TV, I yelped suddenly coz the baby kicked and I was shocked. KL poked his finger onto my tummy and said, “Stop kicking your mother, you punk!”

Hehee… I thought that was really cute.

This is the first outfit we bought for the baby. Hope he can fit into it on his first trip back in SunnyLand by the end of the year or early next year.

I just had my ultra sound scan. These are the words the sonographer said:

“Good news - One live baby.”

“Bad news - He is standing on his head. Makes my job harder.”

First look at the screen - I didn’t know which was up or down. Then I realised where the head was, and it came a complete shock to me. I have only seen ultra sound scan pictures of babies lying horizontally, but never upside down vertically. Hahaa…

We heard the heart beat next. Really loud and fast.

Then, his hand was waving and moving so much. His legs stretched and back to normal. So much movement, I only wish I could feel it. We also saw the spine and the heart beating on his chest.

The next thing that happened came a complete shock. I was asked to change into a gown with underwear off and instinctively, I knew I am going to get one of those dildo scan that was mentioned in the pregnancy forum I have been reading. I wasn’t exactly expecting that. But luckily, I have been reading those forum site so often to know whats happening. I think KL must be a bit confused for a while.

Sonographer did his checks for the fluid thingy and then we had a good view of his little foot. Next thing we knew, the baby moved and we saw his face. Okay, not a clear one but it was still a full view of his face. How surreal!

Foot and face.

KL and I wasn’t emotional or anything. Not like those in the movies. I guess, I just felt weird and still in shock. Looking at the screen felt very surreal. As if I was watching some documentary on TV.

The due date is around the calculated one so we didn’t have to change anything.

We were given a picture and a DVD of the scan. I am quite embarrassed about the stupid things I asked and said during the scan. I was nervous and basically ignorant being my first time.

Before posting this, I had watched the DVD at least 5 times!

Anyway, good news for KL. He once mentioned that if I had twins, he would cut. Well, I guess he don’t have to cut whatever he was thinking of.

I read in my pregnancy books that pregnant women have vivid and weird dreams.

I have been dreaming a lot but nothing significant worth mentioning.

Last night, I dreamt my baby was a puppy. My mum was teaching me how to burp the puppy after feeding. SCARY!

Thank goodness I didn’t dream the feeding part.

Alright, excuse me while I go puke my dinner.

Feeling like crap. Morning sickness hit me at the worst. Can’t seemed to shake off puking every night.

Still not eating well coz no appetite.

Baby don’t like fruits after dinner. Sure to puke while showering.

Water taste bad. Drinking water makes me puke too.

Argh!

Went to the Obgyn today. He is quite a funny guy. He told KL that from now onwards, everything is his fault. Heh!

He is patient and answered to all my frivolous concerns and worries. I worry the slightest thing. Even the fact I haven’t felt tired yet, like most pregnant ones. He said I will be tired for the next 25 years. Apparently his eldest is 24.

I will have to go for my ultrasound and blood test on my 12 weeks.

KL says his seems like a very “soft” doctor. He is indeed like my gyne back home. I’m happy with this doctor.

So far, God have been kind and I have a smooth pregnancy. Still, too early to claim victory. Only can continue to pray and hope that it goes on like this the whole journey.

The only good thing about being pregnant (so far), is …

I don’t have to suck in my tummy anymore. However, due to many years of training, its hard to kick the habit.

Bad thing is, my pants are getting tighter. Worse thing is…

Most of my bottoms are fitting. (denial/vain)

The terms of endearment I can’t stand most are ‘hubby’ & ‘wifey’. Lately I have been burdened by the word, ‘preggers’. *bleh*

All these words makes me want to punch someone. Seriously!

KL and I have been killing each other with more murder cringing words. Here are some fine examples:

- Father of my child
- Mother of my child
- Little KL

*vomit*

Today, we came up with some pretty nauseating words:

- fruit of our love
- love child

*puke*

Have I mentioned that my office is currently very “Productive”? I don’t mean as in efficiency. I mean as in Pregnancy.

There are a lot of women pregnant in my office lately. The number is shocking. The last I counted, there was a total of 6 girls pregnant in the half of 4th Floor.

I went to a Birthday party of a colleague on Saturday and another colleague announced that she is 12 weeks pregnant. Because she is an Admin Assistant and damn free, she said that she counted and there is a total of 9 pregnancy this year in the office. She is Number 9.

I reckon I am Number 10 since the year is coming to an end and I haven’t heard anything otherwise.

I’ve been telling my boss that I believe its the water. I am contemplating on putting up a sign at the water cooler - “Drink at your own risk”.

Dad called me today and ask me to do BS a favour - Dad wanted me to bottle my office water and courier it back for BS or NL.

Hehee… I might consider.

BS, you want or not?

We went to KL’s office function today and met up with his office mates. Some new and some I met previously before.

I was chatting with his boss’s wife and she was upfront and said I looked different. Well, I haven’t seen her for over a year so obviously I look different. She then grabbed my arm and told me I had put on some weight. Oh gosh! I was quite embarrassed. Gosh. Of course I put on weight since she last met me. Next thing she did was looked at me and asked if I was pregnant.

Well, I have this policy. I only tell family and people that matters and if anyone asked, I won’t deny. So I blushed, laughed and nodded. She half screaming in excited and stretched out her hands to rub my non-existence baby belly. Seriously, I swear she was rubbing my McNuggets and Fries meal I ate earlier.

First time I got molested in public. Molested my fats.

She was really excited and begin telling me that she have been trying for a while, seen doctors and really want a child. I soon understood why she was rubbing my belly - just like the Buddha with the big belly, she was hoping she would get some luck off me.

She asked how far along am I and that I should keep it a secret till at least 3 mths. And she dashed off to informed her husband (KL’s boss). He was pretty excited and gave KL a high-five. He understood all the pangtang about telling until the baby is stable at the 3rd month. I indicated to KL that his boss knows and he seemed pretty pleased.

Anyway, the whole night, KL’s boss’s wife kept rubbing my tummy and telling me to watch my diet and stuff. I bet you that everyone else at the party who have half a brain would realise what’s happening. Especially when they see someone else’s hand attached to my tummy.

I think all is exciting until I get nauseous again.